If you’re anything like me, you’re an idiot. And idiots believe anything their Uncle Charlie tells ’em. Like the time Charlie and I drank at my cousin’s wedding all night until the break of dawn. Between bouts of unconsciousness on that trampoline, I was privy to Charlie’s rants about canned beer. He only drinks bottles. Green bottles, specifically. Charlie’s rants about beer cans vs bottles impregnated my impressionable college mind so deeply and perversely that I was terrified when we decided to pursue our first canned beer, Extra BIG-ASS Beer – Oktoberfest style lager (and look out for cans of our Tom Waits for No One – stout in winter 2018). As it turns out, Charlie’s canned beer belief system is as fragile as the green bottles he drinks from. Here are 3 facts about canned beer you and Charlie should know… Not that Charlie will read them. He believes the internet is a Mayan conspiracy.
1. Beer cans are more recyclable.
Everything is bad for the environment, including this blog post. But aluminum is the most recyclable material on the planet. In fact, the energy consumed to make one fresh can equals the energy used to make 20 recycled ones. Also, aluminum can be recycled indefinitely, and its lower density makes it cheaper to ship. Take that, glass. (Note that aluminum’s footprint to produce rather than recycle is quite big, so be sure to recycle those cans.)
2. Beer cans do not make the beer taste metallic.
There is a neat lining on the inside of every beer can that prevents corrosive beer from ever coming into contact with aluminum. “But Josh, I’ve definitely tasted metallic or tinny canned beer before.” Listen, Charlie, I’ve had enough of your shit. That flavour is probably the metal can sitting right beneath your nose, your primary flavour picker upper, as you drink. Pour your beer in a glass and taste again. If it’s still metallic, it’s likely an off-flavour from the brewing process: incorrect water profiles, yeast health issues, or brewery tank wear.
3. Beer cans keep the beer fresher and tastier.
Unlike bottled beer, canned beer is airtight. Nothing kills the flavour of a beer easier than oxidation. Ever cracked a beer, nodded off, and then tasted it the next day? Yes, Charlie, I know this is a daily occurrence for you. Oxidized beer, or “flat beer”, has little to no carbon dioxide and therefore no body. It also typically tastes bad, perhaps like cardboard. Also, unlike bottles, beer cans do not allow UV rays to enter the vessel. Ever had a skunky tasting beer? UV rays from light sources can interact with a chemical component of hops to produce 3-methyl-2-butene-1-thiol, which is not unlike the sulfur (thiols) present in a skunk’s secretion. Green and clear bottles are especially ineffective for preventing UV penetration.
There you have it. Scientific evidence that canned beer is vastly superior in every way to bottled beer. Oh, and we’re happy to announce our first bottled beer, bourbon-barrel-aged Mississippi Goddam American barleywine.